Facing our Terror Barrier

How do you deal with that inner beast? That part of you that tells you, you’re no good and you can’t amount to anything; that part of you that is always fearful of doing new things; that part of you that prevents you from stepping up and going beyond your comfort zone – This is what I refer to as your “Terror Barrier”, an imaginary fear barrier that holds us all back from doing the things we really want to do.

In this month’s article I want readers to really understand the four main stages of the human physic. This will enable you to become aware of what I call the creative process and with awareness comes understanding and a sense of knowing – And once we know we can never go back to not knowing!

Here goes… for greater emphasis am going to quickly explain how the mind works then am going to take you through a personal experience walking you through the Terror Barrier. At the end am going to call you to action.

THOUGHT MIND – THINKING MIND
FEELING MIND – CONDITIONED MIND
WHEN YOU TAKE ACTION YOU GET RESULTS
	BODY TAKES ACTIONS

This is the picture that we use to illustrate the mind and how the mind works in our trainings:

· Here you choose your thoughts using your five senses and you have the ability to accept or reject any idea or thought that you want. This is the first part of the human personality called your “CONSCIOUS MIND”!

· Here your thoughts cause your feelings – ideas and thoughts makes us feel certain emotions and these emotions are like chemical releases in the body that makes us display a variety of emotions around this particular idea or thought that we are having. This part does not have the ability to choose or reject any idea or thought it can only accept the idea or thought that has been accepted uncritically by the conscious mind. This is the part where our habits become fixed and run on auto pilot when the feeling or thought is evoked. This is the second part of the human personality called our “SUB-CONSCIOUS MIND”!

· Here your feelings are expressed into actions. This is the third part of the human personality and it is called the “BODY”! This is the most obvious part and the biggest part of our personality but the body is just a mass of energy that is directed and controlled by the other two parts. So, in other words the body is just an instrument of the mind. Once we have an idea or thought in the conscious mind, which is then impressed on the subconscious mind then it must be expressed through the only medium it knows and that is the body.

· And ultimately, when we take any kind of action; it must produce results albeit good or bad. That is how the mind works in a nutshell.

There are the four stages we have to go through/experience in order to create any fabric of reality we choose. The stages are as follows:

· Bondage Stage(Comfort Zone)

· Reasoning Stage

· Conflict Stage and

· Freedom Stage

I can better expand on these different stages by giving you a personal experience of them which will in turn reveal how you are creating things in your universe. Everyone has done this before; everyone is doing this currently, and will be doing this in the future… i.e. going through these stages to create their goals, desires and dreams.

So, pay close attention to these stages as I go through them:

PERSONAL EXPERIENCE

The first stage is Bondage or better known as your Comfort Zone – This is me doing what I feel comfortable with let’s call this thing that I love doing X meaning I have a habit or behaviour called X which I know and feel very comfortable doing on a daily basis without any conscious thought. It’s fixed in my mind and I can do it automatically. So it is natural for me to have X thoughts, which gives me X feelings, which moves my body into an X vibration and I produce X results.

During the winter of December 1994, our college organised a disco night, which I took my younger sisters to enjoy with me. We had a great night out but I found myself and my sisters stranded in Brixton at 3am in the morning waiting for a Mini Cab in the cold winter. All Mini Cab stations were empty as there were very busy and we were told they would not be a Cab driver available for hours. I will never forget that faithful night. This is when I made a declaration to myself that this will never happen to me or my sisters again as I was going to learn to drive period. This is where the thought of driving and owning my own car came to me, which leads right on to the next stage.

The second stage Reasoning, your ability to thinking whatever you want and create ideas, plans, dreams, desires and goals – Here I have now managed to successfully introduced a new thought (Y) into my mind. The new idea Y (driving and owning my own car) was now in my conscious mind but don’t forget I was still conditioned with X (the habit of never having driven or owning a car before). Therefore, still producing X results. I hope this is beginning to make some sense because it is imperative that we are completely aware of these various stages. It is critical to our overall success.

I was very emotionally charged and had a very strong reason why, when I made the promised to myself that I will learn to drive and own my own car – I was committed and compelled to act! The key to any change is to know what you want, know why you want it and get emotionally charged with the thing that you want. I enrolled with BSM driving school for 24 lessons. I wanted to totally immerse myself into it and took the intensive route or better know has, “a crash course” (I had only one outcome either way, drive and own your own car or die trying), hence why I took a crash course. I bought the various driving books, I booked my theory test and my practical test and I started learning. The various actions I took led me onto the next stage.

The third stage Conflict – At this stage your subconscious mind which is your feeling or conditioned mind. The mind that holds all the old habits of acting and behaving that doesn’t want you to change and is trying to hold you back from changing X habits into Y habits. The various actions taken above begins to allow my subconscious mind to start accepting the new idea Y because it is starting to believe that I am really serious about it but don’t forget am still fully conditioned for X. Where X and Y clashes is what we call XYing ourselves, which will move our whole body into a foreign vibration causing us to have doubt, fear and anxiety in our body. XYing ourselves is where the term conflict came from because it is a battle between two opposing views, habits and ideas. This is where most of us including myself go wrong, as soon as X and Y clashes we start to feel doubt, fear and anxiety in our body we immediately revert to type meaning we go back to our old habit (comfort zone, what we know we can do and what we feel really comfortable with). It is at this stage we start to ask self defeating questions like, will I pass or will I fail? Would I be good enough to drive? Is this crash course a good idea? What happens if I learn to drive and don’t have the money to buy a car? We ask all these type of disempowering questions that could really prevent us from getting what we want in life.

Back to my story…I passed my theory test and failed my practical test and at this stage I came face to face with my own Terror Barrier. As I said earlier this is where most people (including myself) give up and return to what they are more comfortable with (Bondage or Comfort Zone).

I refused to accept this as the norm for me – I felt very angry that I applied immediately for a new practical test date. During the month I waited to retake my test – I lived, dreamt, eat and slept driving. Everyone at home was sick and tired of me talking about driving and high way codes. I put myself in a state where I felt I could not fail. It was at this stage that I broke through my own Terror Barrier and moved into the final stage.

The fourth and final stage freedom – The learning here is to recognise what the process is, so we understand it and become aware of it, so we act in spite of our doubt, fear and anxiety. All learning, growth and development come from dealing with the “UNKNOWN”. We need to put ourselves in middle of the uncomfortable situation long enough to make them comfortable through, awareness, learning, understanding and practice via action.

I took my test and passed in my own car (a £600 Nissan Cherry at the time). Everything is possible when you understand the creative process. This is where I finally got to change my old habit X (not knowing how to drive and not owning my own car) and introduced a new habit Y (learnt to drive and owned my own car) and became one of the best drivers in Great Britain.

I have a question for you – What is your Terror Barrier?

Is it learning a new language, starting a new job, starting your own business, buying a new home, starting a new sport or activity, or is it learning to drive and owning your own car? Whatever it is for you I challenge you to walk through your Terror Barrier and if you want some support with that then please do not hesitate to contact me at tosin.

Abraham Maslow puts it beautifully, when he said, “You will either step forward into GROWTH or you will step back into SAFETY.” The only question is what would your CHOICE be? You decide!

Love & Light

Tosin Ogunnusi

www.thinktrainingconsultancy.co.uk

‘Spice it up’

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Happy New Year

New Year’s Resolutions:

Dear readers this month’s article is going to be about our new year’s resolution. Every year friends, colleagues, family and loved ones come up with a new year’s resolution and this could vary drastically from losing weight, stop smoking to joining the gym to exercise more or eating healthier foods and maintaining a better work life balance. Whatever this maybe for you, in my professional and personal experience new year’s resolution rarely works. It’s more of a wish than a well thought out goal or plan of action. It usually has no conviction or genuine commitment behind it and a lot of people who make the resolution including myself in the past never take it seriously.

This year I want to suggest that you as the reader of this newsletter take a new and fresh approach to your life. We only have one life and we need to live it! Don’t hide under your duvet covers, step up and face the reality of the current climate. Are you dreaming of a better tomorrow? Well if your answer to that question is “YES”, then today is your lucky day; rather than talk about the old boring new year’s resolutions I want to talk about making concrete plans and setting realistic goals for your life that inspires, motivates and encourages you to continue to take actions towards its fulfilment throughout the year of 2010 and beyond.

The main issue I have with new year’s resolutions is we make them at the beginning of the year and most of us never review then until the end of the year. At which point we are ready to make another one or the same new year’s resolution for the next year and so on and so forth the circle continues. This year I want our readers to take a turning point and break that pattern of behaviour . This year I want to introduce you all to five simply steps for really following through on your goals, dreams or desires . It doesn’t matter what you call it they are the same and the real difference is that following this five simple steps will set you up for success and would allow you to follow through on your plans. This is the real benefit.

Let’s call these five simple steps, “The Ultimate Success Formula!” Which helps you ignite your passion and achieve what you want in life and there are as follows:

· 1. Decide what it is that you really want. Here just take some time out of your busy timetable maybe during the weekend and seat somewhere, where you will not be disturbed; close your eyes and relax. Start to think and I mean really think about your life. Thinks about the wonderful things in your life and the not so wonderful things in your life and be grateful for all. Think about the things you are really good at that really makes you feel alive and think about the things that you are not really good at and would like to be good at. Take as long as you like during this process at the end open your eyes and make a written description of everything your thought about and then really decide what it is that you really want your life to be about and what is you really want to create and do in this life time. Only one caveat, you must not allow your limiting belief or past experiences or negative beliefs to influence you when deciding what it is that you really want to do because your past does not equal your future. Don’t judge your decision, just decide and proceed to number 2 where you will start to explore the reasons why you want it not how you are going to get it because that comes later.

· 2. Know the reason why you want it (This is your motivation as reasons come first then answers come second). This is the most critical part because once we know the reason why we want something then we inject into ourselves the inspiration and motivation that will keep us going no matter what obstacles we encounter. Most people who know what they want but do not have a reason why usually end up giving up at the first sign of trouble or challenge. When you have outlined your reasons why you want it then you need to have a plan of action that will allow you to start moving towards it fulfilment.

· 3. When you know what you want and you have a reason why you want then you need to take constant and immediate action. Taking action is the only way in which we can achieve what we really want. Taking action has within it great elements such as, conviction to making something happen, a belief that you can do it, a faith in yourself or your maker that it can be done, positive attitude, a commitment to a cause. When we take action we invoke everything within our being at all levels (spiritually, emotionally, mentally and physically).

· 4. When take action always notice what you are getting in return. The question to ask yourself here is, “Is the results you are producing getting you closer to achieving your goal or not?” Anyone who takes a committed action toward achieving a particular goal will undoubtedly encounter challenges and hurdles to overcome. That’s the universe’s way of testing us to see if we are really serious about what it is that we want. Be warned and do not be alarmed when challenges, hurdles and obstacles come your way in the pursuit of your goal. They are to be expected and dealt with in the right manner because they are there to teach us something and if we ask ourselves the right questions we will be furnished with the right answer and approach.

· 5. To always be very flexible in our approach to things. If we notice that the actions we are taking are not getting us any closer to our goals then we need to change our approach and changing our approach could mean a multitude of things and we have to be willing to do whatever it takes to making the necessary changes in our approach or behaviour in order to achieve what we want e.g. Going back to school to learn the skills required to achieve our goal, learning a new language, reading certain books for more knowledge, moving to a new city or country, finding a mentor or coach, getting a personal trainer, learning from others who are already achieving what you want etc. The list goes on…

If everyone was committed to achieving their goals in 2010 then I urge you to follow, “The Ultimate success formula”. Decide exactly what it that you want; Know the reason why you want it; Take constant and immediate action towards it’s fulfilment; Notice what results you are getting at least weekly or monthly; And always be very flexible in your approach by changing your approach or strategy when things aren’t working. If everyone did this we would all be smiling by the end of the year as we would all have achieved our goals or would have made significant progress towards achieving what it is that we want. 2009 is a year for making things happen so scrap your new year’s resolution and make solid goals and plans following the five simple steps known as the, “The Ultimate Success Formula”!

We have no trial runs in life, they is only one life, they is only one chance, they is only one 2010, so come alive and live your life in 2010!

By Tosin Ogunnusi

www.thinktrainingconsultancy.co.uk

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